Cold Night For Alligators
With All That’s Left

Tracklist

• 1. With All That’s Left (05:17)
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  It's surreal, is this a lifetime?
  Got a hold of me, end of a cryptic ride
  Takes a toll on deepest highs
  Life's been cutting deep inside
  Spent all my time unused, it's a riddle
  
  Save my songs for the river
  What's worth a life to consider?
  It's the murder of, the murder of my youth
  I learned that
  Time is not a simple game
  Swallowed so much inner rage
  With all that's left of me today
  I'm crawling to meet my mistakes
  
  Time devours my soul and mind
  It transcends, limits running blind
  Wish I had more of everything
  Without borders into the unknown
  Spent all my time unused
  
  Save my songs for the river
  What's worth a life to consider?
  It's the murder of, the murder of my youth
  I learned that
  Time is not a simple game
  Swallowed so much inner rage
  With all that's left of me today
  I'm crawling to meet my mistakes
  
  So far away from truth
  So far away to begin with
  I'm running from the running clocks
  Please go back to the old days
  So far away from truth
  Let's go back to the old way
  So far away from you
  (So far away from you, so far away from you)
  
  Save my songs for the river
  What's worth a life to consider?
  It's the murder of, the murder of my youth
  I learned that
  Time is not a simple game
  Swallowed so much inner rage
  With all that's left of me today
  I'm crawling to meet my mistakes
  I'm crawling to meet my mistakes
• 2. Dance For You (03:53)
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  We found out like everybody else
  Like everybody else
  Too late to run
  I feel like a ghost with skin
  A vendetta you defined
  
  I am losing you
  I am losing you
  
  Do you want me to dance for you?
  Laugh for you?
  Scream for you?
  Stand it through?
  Stop, it's lost
  
  Do you want me to wait for you?
  Where's the truth?
  Lost and used
  I can't choose
  Stop, it's lost
  
  I found out from every little lie
  From every little lie
  Overrule
  Break me all the time
  All I want to feel is fine
  
  Do you want me to dance for you?
  Laugh for you?
  Scream for you?
  Stand it through?
  Stop, it's lost
  
  Do you want me to wait for you?
  Where's the truth?
  Lost and used
  I can't choose
  Stop, it's lost
  
  Without a dream, without your laugh
  Without my will, you saved yourself that night
  And retained your own mind
  I felt entitled just to stand here
  I am losing you in this insanity
  Only safe in sound, I am saved in sound
  
  I am losing you, overwhelmed and drowned
  While you feel found, I am running blind
  I am losing you
  I am losing you
  
  Do you want me to dance for you?
  Laugh for you?
  Scream for you?
  Stand it through?
  Stop, it's lost
  
  Do you want me to wait for you?
  Where's the truth?
  Lost and used
  I can't choose
  Stop, it's lost
  Stop, it's lost
• 3. I Am Only Fear (04:14)
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  It gave nothing at all
  Throw me a lifeline, persistently rewind
  I'm easy
  Easy to break, I am
  Easy to break
  
  Can you take my pain?
  Can you take this pain away?
  Can you leave some shades?
  All I know is all the grey
  Watch my whole world shake
  Just to illuminate all mistakes
  
  I just feel fear on my own
  What will a new day betide?
  
  I am sick and tired of this game
  I think I'm meant to collide
  Never knew someone who met my lows
  I've been through hell and back
  I've been through hell and back
  
  Can you take this pain?
  Can you take this pain away?
  The softest whisper
  Turns me more and more confused
  Living by design
  But I'm no architect, so please protect
  
  I choose a thousand nights in rage
  All for the sake of just one smile when I awake
  And the limbs that we break
  I just feel fear on my own
  Swallowed my own pride
  I just feel fear on my own
  What will a new day betide?
  I just feel fear in my own mind
  
  I am sick and tired of this game
  I think I'm meant to collide
  Never knew someone who met my lows
  I've been through hell and back
  I've been through hell and back
  
  I am sick and tired of this game
  I think I'm meant to collide
  Never knew someone who met my lows
  I've been through hell and back
  I've been through hell and back
  
  I was born this way
  Is there someone or something that can be saved?
  Was taught to hide and breathe in the waste
  They made me, I processed, so now I'm erased
  
  I am sick and tired of this game
  I think I'm meant to collide
  Never knew someone who met my lows
  I've been through hell and back
  I've been through hell and back
  
  I am sick and tired of this game
  I think I'm meant to collide
  Never knew someone who met my lows
  I've been through hell and back
  I've been through hell and back
• 4. Changeling (03:49)
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  Oh, you showed me a way, but you forced it all
  If I wither in shame, I can't stand through storms
  (Good night)
  
  In the night, in the night, if you see me, I'm not the same
  In the light, in the light, I feel free to breathe in the change
  Whisper only lies, wrecking my mind
  Left a trail of dust, like a candle in disguise
  In this prison, my body finds its haven
  All that will survive, in a pitfall of lies
  
  Oh, you showed me a way, but you forced it all
  If I wither in shame, I can't stand through storms
  
  In the night, in the night, if you see me, I'm not the same
  In the light, in the light, I feel free to breathe in the change
  Please let go of me, please let go of me now
  Into the night
  Please let go of me, please let go of me
  Into the night
  
  Don't you see it's mine? A story to define
  I will compromise myself to stay alive
  But you shouldn't combine what I have inside
  Balancing all the signs, oh, changeling
  
  Oh, you showed me a way, but you forced it all
  If I wither in shame, I can't stand through storms
  I can't stand through storms
  I can't stand
  Hey
  
  In the night, in the night, if you see me, I'm not the same
  In the light, in the light, I feel free to breathe in the change
  Please let go of me, please let go of me now
  Into the night
  Please let go of me, please let go of me now
• 5. In The Dark (04:06)
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  Quietly crying yourself to sleep
  Wings cut off way too deep
  Tears don't wipe away memories, they leave
  No one cares, but you can never sleep
  Such a waste of a beautiful life
  A new predator watches you move
  He takes away your passion
  
  Hope everyone will tell me you're okay
  These wounds can never be yours to break
  Don't fight for me, don't fight for them to stay
  You lost, you're floating too far away
  
  You'll carry anyone, your heart is heavy
  You carry everyone, your heart is heavy
  You'll carry anyone, your heart is heavy
  You carry everyone, your heart is heavy
  
  You just don't know what to do
  Smiling for me and for everyone
  You cannot choose what you need
  Nothing but guilt
  A star fades in the dark
  I am dancing with you
  We are not alone, not alone again
  
  Hope everyone will tell me you're okay
  These wounds can never be yours to break
  Don't fight for me, don't fight for them to stay
  You're lost, you're floating too far away
  
  You'll carry anyone, your heart is heavy
  You carry everyone, your heart is heavy
  You'll carry anyone, your heart is heavy
  You carry everyone, your heart is heavy
  
  Any, anyone, your heart is heavy
  Every, everyone, your heart is heavy
  Please let go of yourself, my love
  Please let go of yourself
  Please let go of yourself
• 6. These Blind Spots (03:55)
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  Stones
  
  I woke up into a world that was stolen
  Falling back into these blind spots of nothingness
  Only surrounded by the moon and its levitating light
  Screams won't appear, shaped into nothing I know
  
  Didn't want it to be real
  Can't reclaim what I feel
  
  I'm losing my tomorrow
  Come back to me in silence, my weary glow
  I'm losing my tomorrow
  Just standing tall, endeavour
  (Smothered and erased)
  
  Leave my emotions to my own mind
  So far from who I was
  So far from who I was
  Hidden secrets will not find light
  They are buried inside of me
  Tried screaming at what it is
  
  But the shame was building up
  The shame was pulling me down
  I might lose myself in the middle of these concrete walls
  I seek forgiveness from these whispering thoughts
  Conscious, but so obnoxious
  
  Didn't want it to be real
  Can't reclaim what I feel
  
  I'm losing my tomorrow
  Come back to me in silence, my weary glow
  I'm losing my tomorrow
  (Smothered and erased)
  
  And I am afraid of everyone
  I am afraid of what they've done
  But I need to push through
  Burn it down to the roots
  
  I'm not good at goodbyes
  But I'm not looking back
  My eyes flickering bright
  Truth feels frayed
  I'm not good at goodbyes
  I'm not good at goodbyes
  My eyes flickering bright
  Truth feels frayed
  
  Just standing tall, endeavour
  Pushing through whatever
  I'm losing my tomorrow
  Come back to me in silence, my weary glow
  I'm losing my tomorrow
  Just standing tall, endeavour
  Smothered and erased
  
  And I am afraid of everyone
  I am afraid of what they've done
  But I need to push through
  Burn it down to the roots
• 7. .44 Lifeline (03:34)
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  So many hours afraid
  Left in the morning rain
  Haunted by everything
  Wash time and place away
  So much devoted hate
  Lifetime
  .44 lifeline
  
  Don't you know that we're all lost?
  And we are trying to figure it out
  Don't you see that we're all fucked?
  As we are trying to figure it out
  If you don't believe in empathy
  Try to figure it out
  If you don't believe and cannot see
  Count the figures
  
  You're walking on our homes
  Walking on all that's glowing
  All eyes must be blinded (blinded)
  So many hours of pain
  Nested in arms of rage
  Lifetime
  .44 lifeline
  
  Don't you know that we're all lost?
  And we are trying to figure it out
  Don't you see that we're all fucked?
  As we are trying to figure it out
  If you don't believe in empathy
  Try to figure it out
  If you don't believe and cannot see
  Count the figures
  
  Have you ever cared, ever cared?
  Have you ever cared about us?
  
  Why can't you feel them? (Feel)
  A million voices (whoa)
  Forever in lament (lament)
  Why can't you feel them? (Feel)
  
  Don't you know that we're all lost?
  And we are trying to figure it out
  Don't you see that we're all fucked?
  As we are trying to figure it out
  If you don't believe in empathy
  Try to figure it out
  If you don't believe and cannot see
  Count the figures
• 8. Bittersweet Echoes (04:47)
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  Stones
  Hitting hard, like a simple mistake
  Every teardrop runs down the drain
  Sharpened my knife to feel safe
  What to gain?
  
  I will not stay in its arms
  I'm not able to move, but can't afford to break
  Pain dances behind closed doors
  In the back of my head, the past isn't dead
  They say
  
  You feel stronger when you're healed
  You feel stronger when you're proud
  I scream at it, I scream at it
  I dream of it, I dream of it
  You feel stronger when you breathe
  You feel stronger when you're found
  I scream at it and scream it all out
  Dancing on its grave, a parade
  
  Truth
  Flees away from my thoughts and escapes
  So easy to preach for one day
  Shot down like a star, wrapped in flames
  I remain
  
  Bittersweet echoes withstand
  It's carved into my mind, its mark spreading roots
  No one believed it so far
  Please save my faith
  
  You feel stronger when you're healed
  You feel stronger when you're proud
  I scream at it, I scream at it
  I dream of it, I dream of it
  You feel stronger when you breathe
  You feel stronger when you're found
  I scream at it and scream it all out
  Dancing on its grave, a parade
  
  Ain't we all broken?
  Ain't we all broken stars?
  Ain't we all broken stars?
  
  You feel stronger when you're healed
  You feel stronger when you're proud
  I scream at it, I scream at it
  I dream of it, I dream of it
  
  You feel stronger when you're breathe
  You feel stronger when you're found
  I scream at it and scream it all out
  I scream at it and scream it all out
  Dancing on its grave, a parade
  I scream at it and scream it all out
  Dancing on its grave, a parade
  I scream a fit and scream it all out
  I scream at it and scream it all out
• 9. Astonishing (04:08)
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  Tellin' me I am nothin', worn out and sore
  Crawlin' on my skin, I need so much more
  What's the point of me in this duality?
  It keeps comin' back every time I seek
  It's the man in me, it's the boy in me
  It's the love, the hate, and the lust in me
  
  Astonishin'
  Burnin' restless
  
  My voice is shakin', my heart's unsure
  You capture evil, I am so much more
  It's the lies in me, it's the pain in me
  It's a big black sky of insecurity
  It's the highs in me, it's the loathe I feel
  It's a fear I cannot, cannot flee
  
  Some kind of peace
  These are my wounds, covered up
  I wanted it all
  Where is my cover?
  
  You made me bleed
  I wanted it all
  I wanted it all
  Still you're just sittin' there
  I wanted it all
  Offerin' nothin'
  I wanted it all (nothin')
  Nothin' at all
  
  Leave me, leave me
  Get out of my head
  
  Some kind of peace
  These are my wounds, covered up
  I wanted it all
  I wanted it all
• 10. Melancholy Waves (04:07)
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  Everything rusts in my dreams
  Every hope cut out and breached
  Locked inside all of this grief
  Everything clustered by needs (lookin' for the great escape)
  Everything cuts to the bone
  Wanderin' lost and alone (hostage, I got lost astray)
  Vital to find some relief
  
  My armor was forced, I cannot breach from skin
  My own rumors say it's all I've saved within
  When somebody knows, cut ties so cold
  Still not near bein' my own king
  
  Can't bear the fact that I'm covered in pain
  Just let me lose my self-control
  My innocence is long gone in vain
  Just let me lose myself
  
  Lookin' for the great escape
  Hostage, I got lost astray
  I've cut through the smoke
  Surroundin' these melancholy waves
  Just let me lose my self-control
  
  Yes, I am aware that I am not enough
  Pulled downstairs, under surface, lost
  Blinded by curves for all I am worth
  I found new ways to understand
  
  And found a reason not to
  I found a place to understand
  And found a reason not to
  Through the time of need
  Through the time of guilt
  Please find a place I understand
  
  Lookin' for the great escape
  Hostage, I got lost astray
  I've cut through the smoke
  Surroundin' these melancholy waves
  Just let me lose my self-control
  
  Everything rusts in my dreams, every hope cut out and breached
  Locked inside all of this grief
  I've cut through the smoke (everything clustered by needs, everything cuts to the bone)
  Surroundin' these melancholy waves (wanderin' lost and alone, vital to find some relief)
  Just let me lose my self-control
  
  Everything rusts in my dreams, every hope cut out and breached
  Locked inside all of this grief, everything clustered by needs
  Everything cuts to the bone, wanderin' lost and alone
  Vital to find some relief
  
  Lookin' for the great escape
  Hostage, I got lost astray
  I've cut through the smoke
  Surroundin' these melancholy waves
  Just let me lose myself
Duration: 41:50